Real Simple Mama

Real. Simple. Parenting.

Category: Attachment Parenting (page 1 of 3)

Here you will find everything related to Attachment Parenting. This is the foundation of why I do what I do, and actually is the inspiration behind Real Simple Mama!

Attachment parenting (AP) is the concept of listening to your child, being aware of their needs and where they are developmentally, and working with your child. We should be on the same team as our kids, not trying to bully them or scare them into obeying us. Instead, we teach our children about everything from eating healthy foods, to how to be kind to others, to earning respect and trust. There’s an emphasis on emotional intelligence and talking through things instead of punishing or yelling.

AP has its place in every phase of parenting, from the littles ones all the way through teenage years! It’s helped me be a better, more confident, more relaxed mom. And I know that my kids are blossoming because they respect and love me. They aren’t scared of me and they hold no resentment.

I hope that I can help teach you about how beautiful (and real simple) being an AP can be!

A Bedtime Routine for The Breastfeeding, Bedsharing Toddler

There are about one hundred ways to get your toddler ready for bed. And I bet you know them all: from baths to massage to lullabies and stories, everyone has the routine which works for their little one.

But when you breastfeed (which means that you probably nurse to sleep, and also possibly bedshare), your ritual can look quite different. So I thought I’d give some perspective to the parenting posts of the world, and show you what bedtime looks like at our house. Read on for a bedtime routine for a bedsharing toddler. Continue reading

A Mama’s Instinct

Us mamas have doubt coming at us from all sides: everyone from our well-meaning mother in law to the old lady at the grocery store fuel that little voice in our heads which constantly says “You’re screwing up your kid.” But I’m here to give you a breath of fresh air, and to remind you that a mama’s instinct is pretty damn amazing. Continue reading

Be Thankful: Teaching Gratitude to Your Children

Gratitude is a wonderful characteristic for a child to have. And sadly, many children these days don’t exhibit it well. But like most other emotions, gratitude must be taught. Here’s a quick list of suggestions for helping your child learn thankfulness this holiday season. Continue reading

The Double-Edged Sword of Mom Guilt

Unwinding in a fragrant, steaming hot bubble bath. Eating a delicious hot meal slowly and deliberately, savoring every bite and enjoying meaningful conversation. Getting a spa pedicure. Peeing alone.

Apparently as a mom, I’m not supposed to want those things. Because if I do it means that I don’t love my kids.

I don’t have anyone to blame for this mentality more than myself. Sure society can be a bit of a jackass sometimes, and make me feel like I should always be overjoyed to be trapped in my home 24/7 with my offspring. I don’t earn an income per se (though let’s not get started on the outrageous daycare savings) and I don’t have a “real job.” I mean, all I do is sit around and watch TV in yoga pants, right?

Cue hysterical laugh. Continue reading

Raising Children with Emotional Intelligence

I want my children to grow up with a healthy emotional intelligence. Simply put, I want them to have a healthy range of emotions, know the vernacular so that they can express those feelings, and deal with unpleasant feelings in a safe way. That emotional education begins when they are still quite young and must happen regularly. Let me give you some insight into what’s working beautifully for our family! Continue reading

Milestones, Leaps, and the Wonder Weeks: A Real Simple Introduction to Your Baby’s Development

Being aware of your baby’s milestones and leaps will save you a lot of worry and stress, as you are able to anticipate and meet their needs. Remember that a baby grows more (physically and neurologically) in their first year, than any other year of their life!

I didn’t even know what a milestone was with my first kid until he was close to a year old; no one told me about it, and it would have helped me so much with my first baby! And leaps? Forget about it! (Oh if I only knew then what I know now, right?).

This text is designed to help parents and caregivers navigate the rough waters of baby development. Awareness of leaps and milestones allows parents to guide their infant through all of the changes, regressions, and new skills which each leap presents. Continue reading

Teaching My Child with Natural Consequences: The AP Alternative to Punishment

My son is an amazing child: he’s considerate, kind, and sensitive. And I knew early on that I would never spank or hit him. But he’s at an age where we need to have an effective, consistent way to correct him and teach him.

I’m here to tell you: attachment parenting does not mean that you let your kids do whatever the hell they want. We have high expectations, we are consistent, and we mean what we say. But how we discipline our kids may look quite different from what you’re used to. And let me say, it works beautifully. Continue reading

Keeping Your Kids Safe

Turn on the news and you will see: it’s a dangerous world out there. While we try to surround ourselves with good people and safe experiences, our children will one day be out on their own. We must prepare our kids for all kinds of situations. And the dialogue starts when they’re still young and innocent.

Here I’ll give you some suggestions on how to begin those essential conversations. Continue reading

Why We Bedshare: The Simple Beauty of Cosleeping

Cosleeping is a natural thing, and you see it in cultures all over the world. A lot of families cosleep: it’s what works for them. But I think most parents are ashamed or embarrassed to admit this. Why? There are lots of reasons to bedshare, lots of benefits to all family members, and lots of ways to do it safely. Let’s get rid of the stigma that bedsharing is dangerous or crazy, and teach parents the truth: it can be pretty damn awesome. Continue reading

How To Talk To Your Kids

Do you have an open relationship with your kids? Do you feel that you have mutual trust and respect? Are you comfortable talking to your kids about anything, and you feel that they would come to you if they had a problem or a question?

I think that most parents really have their heart in the right place, and they want to do well for their children. My nine years of teaching experience, from kindergarten through high school seniors, plus my experience as a parent, have proved this to me. But with all of the hundreds of students I have taught, I have also dealt with hundreds of parents. And I have noticed some recurring behaviors in regards to the students who felt a disconnect with their parents.

Many parents are just in survival mode. They take what their children say at face value, and have so many other stressors and distractions in life that it is easy for them to miss what is going on in their child’s world. Their child feels ignored, unimportant, or like their parents would not understand.

The other thing which I frequently observe is the parents who just do not know what to say to their kids. They hesitate to have discussions about difficult or mature topics, like puberty or sex. Since it makes the parent uncomfortable, they refrain from saying anything at all.

The problem is, at one point or another your child is going to have some troubles or some questions. If you do not have that “open door” rapport with your child, they will find their comfort or their answers elsewhere.

I do not think I need to say more than that.

I’ll give you a little bit of tough love: you are a parent. So you need to be a parent. For the sake of your child – their safety, their happiness – I do not care if it makes you uncomfortable. Your child needs to see that you love them and you are making the effort.

So let’s get to it: here are the five tips I’ve got to help you start building that open, honest communication with your kid. Continue reading

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