There is a lot of confusion and misinformation over what a stay at home mom actually does all day. Some people forget that she exists, some think that she just lays around or shops online, and others are happy in their ignorance. I got really tired of being ignored and unappreciated so I thought I’d write down everything I did in a typical school day from when I got up until I went to bed. It’s the painful honest truth: This is what a day in the life of a stay at home mom really looks like. Read and be amazed.

title image of a mother hugging her child for A Day in the Life of a Stay at Home Mom - Real Simple Mama
  • 4:40am – Usually I wake up due to neck pain or a migraine, doze
  • 5: 50am – First alarm goes off, make sure husband is awake
  • 6:00am – Second alarm goes off
  • 6:04am – Get out of bed, inflate Sleep Number mattress, go pee, make tea
  • 6:09am – Put in contacts, wash face, get dressed, put hair up
  • 6:12am – Make breakfast for both kids, make myself a protein shake
  • 6:18am – Wake up both kids, carry youngest onto the couch for cuddles so she doesn’t cry
  • 6:22am – Help youngest get dressed, make sure oldest is up and getting ready for school
  • 6:25am – Feed dogs and let them outside
  • 6:30am – Kids should both be eating, I drink my protein shake and take my medicine
  • 6:33am – Pack lunch and water for my kid in his backpack
  • 6:35am – Quick poop break
  • 6:40am – Told you it was a quick poop break. Put away dishes, straighten up
  • 6:45am – Start a load of laundry
  • 6:48am – Youngest finishes breakfast, needs help getting down and going to potty
  • 6:50am – Finish protein shake, put my things at the back door to go
  • 6:55am – Breakfast is winding down; clean/prep dishes, straighten up kitchen
  • 7:05am – Get kids to poop, brush teeth, finish getting ready, website check
  • 7:10am – Put on shoes, put on makeup if I’m going out with youngest after drop-off
  • 7:15am – Say goodbye to Daddy, load up the car, set alarm
  • 7:25am – Drop off my son at school
  • At this point either my daughter and I head back home, or go out to run errands. This is what it looks like if we go back home.
  • 7:45am – Arrive back home, take off alarm, bring youngest in the house
  • 7:48am – Shoes off, wash hands
  • 7:50am – I make second breakfast while doing dishes and dinner prep
  • 8:05am – Youngest finishes breakfast from earlier, I eat and drink my tea
  • 8:15am – Chicken chores outside, youngest plays on the porch
  • 8:30am – Individual time: I usually write or do website photos/YouTube editing, youngest does craft/artwork
  • 9:00am – Knock things off of to-do list, whether it’s meal planning and grocery list or cleaning house
  • 9:30am – Move laundry over
  • 9:33am – Youngest needs a snack
  • 9:35am – Youngest eats a snack and I clean a room, and take out the trash/recycling
  • 9:55am – Youngest and I do an activity together, from yoga to homeschool to reading
  • 10:30am – Gotta pee, youngest follows me
  • 10:33am – This is when I prefer to work out, so if we didn’t have AM plans then I do it now and youngest watches educational Netflix
  • 11:15am – Workout done, I shower while youngest plays educational games on the iPad
  • 11:35am – Move laundry over, check email and track all my meals and snacks for the day on Weight Watchers, as well as all of my water intake
  • 11:45am – Make lunch, youngest helps
  • 11:55am – Lunch together at the table, usually do homeschool like review ABCs
  • 12:15pm – Clean up from lunch, use potty, brush teeth
  • 12:25pm – Youngest picks a book and we read in bed
  • 12:35pm – Youngest goes down for a nap, my time to work (usually write or freelance)
  • 1:45pm – Youngest wakes up from nap, we get a snack
  • 1:50pm – Homeschool or activity time, and outdoor afternoon chores like watering plants, working in garden, filling bird feeders, etc.
  • 2:50pm – Use potty, put on shoes, go to wait in pick up line to get oldest
  • 3:35pm – Back home: Shoes off, wash hands, go through backpack, pack lunch and snack for next day
  • 4:15pm – Mom does a work out and (hopefully) showers; kids get educational Netflix and/or iPad time
  • 5:15pm – Daddy comes home, start dinner prep and kids do reading/homework
  • 6:00pm – Family dinner, clean up afterwards
  • 6:35pm – Kids can have free play time in their playroom or continue doing schoolwork; I do writing or cleaning or Youtube videos
  • 7:15pm – Clean up time, wind down
  • 7:30pm – Family reading time
  • 7:50pm – Kids brush teeth, use the potty, change into clean clothes
  • 8:05pm – Lights out, goodnight kisses and cuddles, kids listen to a story on Calm
  • 8:10pm – I go change and make my nighttime tea and get my daily piece of chocolate!
  • 8:20pm – Lay everything out for next day, from my clothes to all the breakfast stuff
  • 8:30pm – Sit down with Daddy, chance to watch a show or read or just talk
  • 9:00pm – Let the dogs out one more time, set house alarm
  • 9:05pm – Drink my tea, eat my chocolate, relax a little bit, do my daily Duolingo lesson
  • 9:30pm – Go finish getting ready for bed
  • 9:45pm – In bed – do a Calm meditation and then fall asleep

And oh hey, this is a short list of the things that I usually manage for my house:

  • Meal planning
  • Grocery list: planning, ordering, pick up, washing/put away
  • Budget, including utilities and all other bills/expenses
  • All appointments, routine and urgent for all people and pets
  • House appointments and scheduled maintenance
  • Breakfast for all, lunch for all, snacks for all
  • All laundry including towels and bedsheets
  • School calendar
  • Christmas, birthdays, remembering other gifts
  • Garden and chickens
  • Running a website and a YouTube channel
  • Writing eBooks
  • Teaching music lessons
  • Teaching a weekly Spanish class
  • Volunteering with Kiddo’s school
  • Working with local moms chapter
  • Shopping and errands, including clothes/shoes
  • Dusting and vacuuming
  • Disinfecting after anyone is sick
  • Cleaning bathrooms including toilets
  • Taking out trash
  • Enrichment for the kids like local classes
  • Working out daily and dieting
  • Other freelancing money

I hope that maybe this has given you some insight into the “secret life” of a stay at home mom. So many of the chores, errands, bookkeeping, life maintenance, counseling, appointments, and other “invisible” work goes on while my husband is at work, and so no one really sees or knows how much I do. And did I mention there’s no paycheck?

Let’s be real: The work only feels invisible because no one wants to look. But I want to help stop that. I want SAHMs to feel just as respected as working moms, working dads, single parents, LGBT parents, foster and adoptive parents, or any other demographic. Don’t let society be blind to us. We do too much and our work is too precious.

So please give that stay at home mom in your life a little grace. Smile, be kind, be patient, ask how you can help. We do a lot of shit for our families that usually doesn’t get appreciated or praised. And we are so tired.

If you want to see what my schedule looks like in regards to the two kids, you can check out our daily schedule here.

Are you a stay at home mom? What does your daily schedule look like?

title image of a mother hugging her child for A Day in the Life of a Stay at Home Mom - Real Simple Mama